Relaxing

Been a rough day so far. Didn't get home 'til after 3am then asleep around 5am. I forgot to turn off the damn alarm so I was up at 8am. Sorta lied in bed all angsty til around 10am. Played LotRO until the throbbing in my head subsided.

With the push to wrap up the second sprint I skipped the gym on Friday. So I went in this afternoon. Talk about pain. The three hours of dancing plus not eating anything for breakfast or lunch seriously pissed my body off.

Got some shopping done though. Grilled some chicken while laundry is going. Watching The Mummy while the various muscles chill. Going over to Justin's in an hour to chill then probably hitting the club again. What's life without pain?

That's Right!

Nigerian lesbian eludes arrest after wedding 4 women
POSTED: 12:39 p.m. EDT, April 26, 2007

LAGOS, Nigeria (Reuters) -- A Nigerian lesbian has gone into hiding to avoid arrest days after marrying four women in the Islamic city of Kano, local media reported on Thursday.

An estimated 2,000 guests watched Aunty Maiduguri, 45, wed the four women in a sumptuous ceremony that was followed by two days of feasting and merry-making.

But neighbors tipped off the authorities, who enforce Sharia law.

"As defenders of Sharia law, we shall not allow this unhealthy development to take place," Rabo Abdulkarim, deputy commander of the state Islamic police, told ThisDay newspaper.

"We are investigating the matter with a view to find the culprits and punish them."

Kano is one of 12 states in northern Nigeria that introduced Sharia in 2000.

Homosexuality is also illegal under secular law in Nigeria. The government introduced a bill last year explicitly to outlaw same-sex marriage in response to its legalization in some Western countries.

Africa's most populous country is split about evenly between Muslims and Christians, and both communities strongly condemn homosexuality.

Copyright 2007 Reuters. All rights reserved.

I'm a little too stunned to comment on this article, so I'll throw out a “You Go Girl!” and be quiet.

Advantages

One of my coworkers has discovered a particularly delicious tea, Lipton Cranberry Pomegranate Green Tea. Instead of buying my own I just badger him for it. In our morning meeting he said he brought some in so I went over to his desk to steal some, but didn't see it.

So I unplugged his Tea Drop, picked up the entire brewing station, carried it over to another desk where he was hiding, then extended it out in front of me and demanded tea. People from the surrounding cubicles also popped out to see what the hell was wrong with me; everyone was laughing and I got my attention for the day. I still get a little too much enjoyment showing off upper body strength.

Few weeks back I bought a pair of those fancy adjustable dumbbells so I could work in extra reps at the computer. Naturally, they had no scannable UPCs. They were only 25-lbs but the nice little lady had a hard time lifting them. So I reached out, one-handed the first one, rotated it across the scanner, and maintained a look of effortlessness. The lady looked at me like I was the Hulk. *giggle* Hefted them around a few more times as other workers came up to help with a price check.

It is fun having some definition across my forearms and biceps. Just need less fat.

Cognoscente

I've heard it said that being overly-impressed with well-turned phrases is a sign of an unsophisticated mind. Well that's me! There are countless dance songs that I love. And my silly brain assigns more than booty-shaking worth to them. Like my current addiction, September's Cry for You:

You'll never see me again
So now who's gonna cry for you?
You'll never see me again
No matter what you do

Love that chorus. I so want to be like that when I break up with someone—confident, empowered, and final. I have the finality down only because I hate regrets and being reminded of mistakes. The refrain is also glorious:

Forever and ever
Life is now or never
Forever never comes around
 People love and let go
Forever and ever
Life is now or never
Forever's gonna slow you down

Simple rhyme scheme with the evolution from the base on lines three and six—love that! Don Henley is still the master but the form still impresses me. And the content… encouragment not to get stuck waiting, to act now. Something I need constant reminding of. As I'm dancing around. *snicker*

Latest Toy

Theo still manages to get me impulse buying. At lunch yesterday we went by the closing CompUSA and I ended up walking out with an Epson PictureMate Snap, resisting the urge to pick up a 42” plasma screen. I had wanted some sort of photo printer for a while. This one seemed to do everything I wanted plus fluffy stuff, so at 40% off I decided to take a chance. The only real limitation that gave me pause was the 4”x6”-only paper support.

Didn't even both hooking it up to the computer because it's really cute as a stand-alone bucket o'printing. Pulled the memory card out of the camera and found the right slot. While it does do cropping or enhancement, the screen is too small to really trust. I had three photos I didn't need to fidget with so I tagged them and hit the print button.

Astonished doesn't quite capture my reaction. It printed all three flawlessly with no border. They all had complicated textures, like water or clouds, that turned out beautifully. Obviously it has been way too long since I've checked out advances in home printing solutions.

Got the consumables research done (which I should have done before buying—*sigh*) and it looks like the bucket's ink costs about 25¢ per glossy and 34¢ per matte. Paper isn't too bad with a decent glossy around 13¢ each.

I don't really need it but it is terribly novel. Plus, if I ever have intimate prints I don't have to worry about lurkers at the Target Kodak kiosk. *snicker*

Hey Sean! How Are You?

I've always wanted to answer in Minnesota Not Nice. Like this afternoon, I would have gone off with: “Oh I don't know. How would you feel if you woke up needing another two hours of sleep to bob'n'weave into work where you face counter-productive meetings or write code that's made summarily obsolete by others on your team so, frustrated, you go to your ghetto gym and pedal eight miles without going anywhere then heft around metal in a vain attempt to satiate your vanity followed by a haphazard shower with strangers and their foot fungi only to come back to work to rapidly consume twelve ounces of Kraft™ Singles since they were the only thing at the on-the-way Rainbo that looked edible without smelling awful so you can resume professional futility?” But no. I just threw out my usual, “Pretty good!” as I skipped back to my cubicle.

Quiet Potential

The last week went by quickly as I spent it doing the usual. Caught my Winter-Spring transitional cold, with the worst of it making me call in Wednesday and the last remnants are leaving me today. Seems with the coming of the sun I am getting out of my slump, even out of the apartment. Walked down to Target yesterday; did another bridge walk today.

Was setting up a shot when two passing bikers honked and yelled, “Don't do it!” Scared the snake out of me. Thankfully didn't drop the camera, muttered “Assholes,” but couldn't help but snicker to myself. The sun was pleasant. Called a Nate I met last night but no one else.

Dad's birthday was yesterday. Figured I'd surprise him by calling. Got the voicemail but he called back before dinner. Managed to get him to talk about himself for nearly five minutes before he started the usual barrage on me. He'll be sixty next year.

Anyway. Watching the last bits of another too-short weekend fade. Probably going to turn in early with a few pages of Chapterhouse: Dune.

So Much for Resolve

Guess I have sorta missed the drunkeness, randomness, and the distration of the bar scene. Danny ended up being really distracted so I sorta let him do his thing. I know how to play his game.¹ One of his friends was like, “Oh! So this is the fireplace guy?” which was all the confirmation I needed.

Was good to catch up with Joe and Pancho. They had lots to talk about which was brilliantly contrasted with my “doing nothing” commentary. There were lots of people there so I didn't as much time as I wanted with them. I'm using that as my excuse to go to the Saloon in a few hours.

I'd forgotten how nice it is to get attention. Like some random Mark… who within ten seconds of getting my name was feeling me up. Or the terribly cute Nick who was an ex of Danny's. Or another Nick who was likely underage but kind enough to feel me up and tweak my left nipple. And all the other non-sense that that is tragically validating.

The total *gasp* of the night was this guy that looked totally like Thayne. A complete wet dream come true. The same spindly body, little taller than me, same hair color and cut, funny adam's apple… everything! But super gay! *giggle* He was a friend-of-a-friend type thing but I couldn't get the introduction because I was too stunned.

Anyway. Danny said he'd be at the Saloon but whatever. Pancho will be going and I offered to buy Joe a motivating drink. I have tomorrow off so might as well make use of it. For now I'm just going to lie down a minute to stop the spinning. Colby also left me one of his typical cracked-out voicemails so I need to return his call.

Fun times. Still… not going home with anyone tonight. I think. *snicker*

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1. Such an abuse. But what else am I going to do with my learning and experience?

Not All Tears Are Evil

Went out to the Saloon last night. It'd been at least six weeks so it took a lot of momentum: hair cut, shopping, boredom, et cetera. My weeks of inactivity have fattened me up nicely. I could still fit in flattering jeans so I just had to go with a black shirt to obscure my gut and love handles. In spite of low esteem I still chanted “will not go home with anyone tonight” while walking to make sure it was echoing in my brain, preventing the alcohol from dampening my resolve.¹

Texted a few people with Easter wishes and on a whim threw in two of my cousins in Idaho. They responded back and even their sister sent me one.² Got me thinking. I'm mostly waiting to die out here. Why shouldn't I be there? I'll never have kids of my own so why not enjoy their years before they're gone. I've actually thought about this before but it was a really strong impulse that I still feel sober. Something for later.

Did okay on my restraint. The only temptation came in the form beautiful eyes attached to a youthful, solidly inebriated guy named Danny. Getting up with him for a drink conveniently got me away from a freak—invariably get one a night. After paying for the drinks he got distracted by some chick he knew so I took the opportunity to slip away. Much easier that way.

Did four drinks instead of the wiser three so I had a choice headache when the fucking sun forced me awake a little after 10am. Nibbled something to compliment the aspirin while watching Lord of the Rings: Return of the King.³ Really didn't feel up to the well-childrened Easter plans so called Nikki to leave voicemail. Did some laundry. Nikki did call me back to make sure it was hang over and not despression that kept me away. So sweet of her… I felt bad lying.

While the dryer cycle was up I walked the 3rd Avenue bridge. The sun was out so I wore a tank top, shorts, and sandals. I suppose it was cold since people with coats and hats looked at me oddly, but might as well put the fat to work. Went by Dunn Bros. for a hot chai to read the Onion while I waited for the two loads to be done.

Tried calling the Grandparents and the eldest cousin to extend Easter wishes but got voicemailed. Annoyingly/surprisingly, Danny called. Sorta told Joe I would go to Show Tunes but I figured I could ditch him. Harder to deny Danny's eyes so I've got clothes picked out. Going to hop in the shower and rehearse my lines. Want to be back sober and before 9pm so I can get some gaming in. Sure I'm a loser… with defenses/excuses in place it's that much easier to wallow.

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1. Need to ease into things. Fucking someone would just put me back on the used/depressed track.
2. Totally surprised me; sorta felt bad because I didnt' have her number otherwise I would have sent her one initially.
3. Found the second and third for $7.50 at Target and couldn't resist; I'd forgotten how epic they are!!

Groove, Sorta

Still really love my XMradio. And while this Sasha track, Fundamental, is totally kicking my ass, I have to admit I still really like a local radio station. Which hasn't happened in … well, decades. I stopped using my XM car adapter. When I'm driving, I'm almost exclusively on The Current—the musal extension of MnPR. The whole “We have no format” thing works 95% of the time. I've heard everything from Portishead to Johnny Cash to Frank Sinatra to Damien Rice to DJ Shadow. Then a bunch of local stuff. And the NPR thing means no commercials.

In fact, heard a song on the way home that I totally loved: Hotel Song by Regina Spektor. Guess I'm excited because this is one of the first Minnesota things I wouldn't mind hanging around to enjoy.

Turbo Boost!

'Knight Rider' Trans Am Up for Sale
The Associated Press
Apr 2, 7:57 PM EST

DUBLIN, Calif. -- KITT, the flame-throwing, river-jumping, talking muscle car from the `80s TV show "Knight Rider," is up for sale. Restored to its debut-season glory, the modified black 1982 Pontiac Trans Am is offered at $149,995 at a Dublin auto dealership. Johnny "Vette" Verhoek of Kassabian Motors has had the car, officially called Knight Industries Two Thousand, on display for about a month.

It is one of four documented "camera cars" used for close-up shots and scenes where David Hasselhoff, who played Michael Knight in the series, was behind the wheel.

Although it cannot achieve the 300 mph speeds that KITT reached, soar 50 feet in the air or throw smoke bombs, key features of the star car are intact. Perhaps most important, the red scanner light on the nose glows and makes a humming noise.

The car has two working video screens on the dashboard, and the cockpit features buttons that light up in green, yellow and red: ski mode, rocket boost, micro jam, silent mode, oil slick and eject.

Most of the buttons don't do anything, Verhoek said. Nor can the car hold a conversation or drive itself.

KITT isn't even street legal because of missing smog equipment and other modifications. Whoever buys the car will probably keep it in a private collection, or it may be purchased by a museum, Verhoek said.

The car belongs to Tim Russo of Livermore, a Kassabian customer who figured now was a good time to test the market, with the 25th anniversary of the show's debut coming up.

Russo purchased the car 10 years ago at an auction in San Diego, and has spent the last decade finding parts to restore it.

Hrm. $150k seems a little steep. Wonder if he'd take $135k?

Close Together, In Uncomfortable Seats

People didn't think I was serious, but I changed out of my formal attire immediately after getting back to the office. Hell, before I ate lunch. Something so constrictive about that stuff, it bothers me. It's not an association thing; it's more an aversion to professionalism thing. *snicker*

The services went about as expected. I so despise cloying Christian parochial ceremonies, but I respected it while I was there. Even said the Lord's Prayer along with them.¹ Kuy's wife was an absolute mess when the shroud was placed and the coffin closed. Understandable but gut-wrenching nonetheless.

I think my biggest realization was the source of my hatred towards pastors in general. They're playing at being the physical embodiment of the Christian God construct that I so loathe. They don't all do the evangelical over-acting that I invariably feel they do. Nor do they all consciously intend the harm they cause. In fact, the suffering they're often surrounded by would crush me. Will have to ease up on the misdirected antipathy.

On a lighter note, I'll have three girls under my watchful eye tonight while Tony and Nikki are out to dinner and Keb'mo. Which means I won't be home 'til Midnight. Oh well. Will be worth it.

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1. The only reason I know it by heart is because it's in Sophie B. Hawkins' California Here I Come.